Minutus cantorum, minutus balorum, minutus carborata descendum pantorum
The Benevolent Order of Zymurology is as ancient as time itself with its beginnings lost to antiquity, although the tenets of our faith have been honed through the ages. While some may claim our Order is too firmly entrenched in the past we do embrace technology and any advancement that might further the cause is most welcome.
Some
time ago, our learned Brother Hopocrates developed a new scientific
approach to determining one's innate state of Ale-evation through the
use of the divinely inspired Beer-e-meter. While many of our practices
remain closed to public scrutiny, this apparatus gauges the initial
receptiveness of those seeking enlightenment within our most sacred of
Orders. The first photo to your right is an example of the passive,
unexcited state of the Beer-e-meter generated by what we now know as
"suckion" particles. Please also note that the Benevolent Order of
Zymurology is skilled in this measuring process and we take every
precaution when handling anything with these levels of suckions.
Several rounds of decontamination are often necessary following the
procedure.
The
second photo on your right shows a successful test of Ale-evation using
the Beer-e-meter. Notice the distinct absence of suckion particles
allows for an exponential degree of both Hoppiness and Maltitude that
appears to illuminate the entire room. These early attempts to measure
the positive attributes of the divine beverage gave rise to a new
enlightened group of which the Order is associated known in laymen
terms as the Aleluminatti.
HISTORY
The immaculate beverage known to laypeople simply as beer is one of the world's oldest dating back to the 6th millennium BC before the advent of writing, credited to the Sumerian's which referenced the most divine of beverages and offered prayers to the goddess Ninkasi. "The Hymn to Ninkasi" served as both a prayer as well as a method of remembering the recipe. Archeological evidence of the creation of beer is over 5,000 years old from the site of Godin Tepe in the Zagros Mountains of western Iran. As several noted scholars through the ages such as Frank Zappa noted, the invention of bread and beer was likely responsible for humanity's ability to develop technology and build civilizations. Although much of the world developed as male dominated societies it is worth remembering women produced most beer until the middle ages. By the 7th century AD beer was increasingly being produced and sold by European monasteries inhabited by monks that delved into the rudimentary scientific methods of the time to improve their craft. During the Industrial Revolution, much of the production of beer in countries such as England and the United States moved from artisanal to industrial production.
Zymurgy
A branch of chemistry which deals
with
wine-making and brewing, 1868, from Gk. zymo-, comb. form of zyme "a
leaven" (from PIE base *yus-; see juice) + -ourgia "a working," from
ergon "work" (see urge (v.)). The last word in many standard English
dictionaries; but in the OED [2nd ed.] the last word is zyxt, an
obsolete Kentish form of the second person singular of see (v.).
Ology
Informally, an ology is a field of study or academic discipline ending in the suffix -ology.The word ology is a back-formation from the names of these disciplines. Such words are formed from Greek or Latin roots with the terminal -logy derived from the Greek suffix -λογια (-logia), speaking, from λεγειν (legein), to speak.
Salvation is within reach